Farewell nonconforming teen

Somewhere deep deep down I knew I would not be a teenager forever. And now with only a little more than a month left it is time to say good bye to this blog, so difficult considering its been more than 6 months since an update. I will no longer be updating this blog, instead I will be updating my new blog focusing predominately on ministry. carismissionsblog.blogspot.com

Feeling Fickle

I had this teacher along the way who would say one phrase repetitively, "Feelings are fickle". Said teacher was only trying to teach us that we cannot rely on our feelings because they will awesome lead us astray. This is true. I have noted that if everything I did was based on feelings I would make a total mess of my life. We live in the a "live for the moment" culture and often it sounds so good. Who doesn't like hearing things like that, especially when it comes to the feelings of being in love or feeling excited. Had I chased after every boy I "fell in love with" I would have lost a lot more than a friend or two in tenth grade. Not that feelings themselves are evil, just misleading. How you respond to your feelings is where we often run into problems, but I am straying just a little from the original intention. I was talking to a friend of mine recently about how her relationship with God was doing. She said that she was tired of going to church, singing songs, and reading the Bible because she didn't feel what she used to anymore. She still believed in God, but she didn't feel anything. Well, I started thinking about it this week quite a bit. You see there are some very high points in my life and also some very low points and last week on Tuesday was one of those low points. However, I see God's faithfulness in the midst of my trials because even though I was hurting I very much felt His presence. Ultimately it boiled down to His asking if I trusted Him, but before I digress again let me get to the point. It is very easy to "feel" God's presence in the hard times because He is compassionate and walks with you. It is also very easy to "feel" God in the super high points. However what about right after those times, when you come out of the valley on to the plain or come down off of the mountain. Suddenly, "feeling" God's presence is a lot more of a challenge. This is either a very good thing or a very bad thing. It is bad because we are tempted to give up, we don't "feel" like reading God's word, so we don't. It may be a very good thing as it gives more opportunity for growth or maturity. So this is the challenge I give to you (and myself). When you come out of some spiritual/emotional high or low and suddenly you are in this place where you cannot "feel" God like you used to, will you continue to pursue God? Will you work on your relationship even though the passion has diminished some?

Acción de Gracias

Today at Bible study as for the past week we have been meditating on Philippians 4:4-9 (4:8 is the whatsoever things... verse). We were instructed to pick two character qualities, look up the greek, study them, and be prepared to share. I chose prayer and thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is where the conviction came. If you note the title again is in Spanish and for a purpose. The reason is that the Spanish word for thanksgiving, the way it sounds at least, is practicing actions of gratefulness. This post however is not about Spanish etymology so that is as far as that goes. The Greek word for thanksgiving is where we get the English word, Eucharist. Literally eucharist means giving thanks to God for grace. After my brief talk, the professor asked us how much of our prayers were spent in giving thanks to God. Ouch! Considering all that God has done for us you would think we would be more grateful. So that is the question of the day. How much of your prayer life is devoted to thanking God?

Este es mi problema

I went to a Spanish speaking church tonight for service and it was fantastic, absolutely love worshipping there because in worshipping in a different language two things often take place. First, I break down the structure of the sentences and make sure I understand completely what I am singing (same happens in sign), and second worship moves far beyond just a sing along because I am actively deciphering the song and my own response to God. We broke into small groups and of course I went with the women because I want to be stretched. So as the lady is teaching I am understanding the majority of what she says, but I have an issue. The issue is that I will not remember things if I do not take notes and when I take notes I cannot focus on what she is saying, translate, and write all at the same time so I often miss things. I decided the happy medium was to go and take notes because understanding all of it does no good if I flush it.

Tonight we talked about attitudes. Somehow we accidently said that an attitude with God is contaminated, but we all discussed our responsibility. If we live in the moment our attitudes will look like a seismogram after a large earthquake. There was a fair amount more and I do remember, it is in my half spanish, half english notes. Not spanglish, but legitimately half and half. So in the mean time as I work on my ability to understand Spanish I will have holes here and there from the bits and pieces I missed.

The Magic of the Oven

Now many of you are aware that I swore I could not cook, but apparently I was mistaken. This afternoon I had a rather late lunch and enjoyed one of the sides which was potatoes that were frankly too amazing that I did not stop long enough to take a picture, but tonight for supper before I devoured my tomato I paused to take a picture because it looked pretty. Originally I had planned to follow the recipe, but due to lack of specific ingredients and not feeling like washing the measuring cups/spoons I eyeballed it. Nothing blew up and it is edible so I consider that a definite victory. So here is what I did. I had half a tomato as seen. I grated some cheese on top (mild cheddar, though the recipe called for parmesan and perhaps when I grocery shop again I'll get some), oregano, olive oil, salt and pepper. Just eyeballed it then put it in the oven preheated to 450º and took it out when it looked right to me. Ok so maybe there might have been a better way to go about it, but I will worry about that on more complicated recipes. Sometime this next week I plan on making banana bread or something. Perhaps I will consider entertaining guests, though frankly the majority of the people I would actually allow to come over live 30 miles away. Oh well perhaps if I am decent I will lure them here.... MUHAHAHAHA. jk.

On a completely different note, officially next Sunday I should be a member of the First Baptist Church. After much prayer I will be baptized again. Oh formalities, how I loathe thee. Hmmmm... don't recall anything else happening.

Adventures in baking

So nothing spiritual or deep, just a blurb. After much fiddling and playing around I finally figured out how to work my oven. I am telling you the blonde hair is a curse, it is not a state of mind, rather a lack thereof. I am the type who will eat the same thing for breakfast every day so long as it is quick and something I can enjoy on the way to class that way I can sleep in as long as possible. So I decided I would experiment with fruit turnovers. I have neither the time nor the patience to go and learn how to make dough so I got some pre-made stuff and apples and decided to give it a try. After about 30 minutes total of prep and baking I have my breakfast for this next week.

First Sunday Home

Its great to be home it really is. First Sunday back and I was interpreting for the service, definitely awesome because I find that I remember more of the sermon that way and it is just so much fun. Difficult? Yes, especially when the pastor gets excited and starts talking fast. The excitement is that either next week or the following I will officially be a member, something for which I am incredibly excited.

First week home has been somewhere between exciting and uneventful, but not mundane. Started school this past Wednesday, witnessed God's strange sense of humor. Much has transpired this past week, but alas World Civ beckons rather commands so I will write again later.